Military families with transgender children are horrified by the House’s passage of the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA), and some servicemembers are now considering leaving the armed forces to protect their kids.

The annual military budget contains a provision banning gender-affirming care for the trans children of military members. The bill passed Wednesday in a 281-140 vote, with 81 Democratic congressmembers voting in its favor.

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“I have a strong desire and propensity to continue to serve, but this will definitely weigh on my and my family’s decision to continue serving — and that’s difficult, but my family’s got to come first,” an Air Force chief with a trans daughter, going by “J,” told The Hill.

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J said he has served for over 20 years and cannot at all see the connection between military readiness and taking away this essential health care. In fact, he sees the provision as actively harmful to morale.

“Taking away something that families are relying on distracts us from the mission and the task at hand in order to be and remain as lethal as we are,” he said.

J’s spouse added, “You can’t say that this is going to help our military when you’re scaring military families.”

If the NDAA passes, his family may have to purchase supplemental health insurance or pay out-of-pocket for their daughter’s health care. J is considering leaving the Air Force in two and a half years when his commitment is up.

Ann, a veteran with a trans son whose husband is currently a senior Pentagon officer, said it feels like the “safety bubbles are getting smaller and smaller and smaller.”

Ann served a 15-month combat tour in Iraq and eight total years in the military. “The country is kind of closing in on us,” she said, “like, we’re running out of places to go, especially with something like the NDAA and just seeing the writing on the wall about a national ban on gender-affirming care.”

Ann’s son receives gender-affirming care through the military health plan TRICARE. She said he is “thriving” as a result, and while her husband does not want to retire, he may do so if NDAA eliminates the coverage they need.

“That’s pretty much marking the end of the road,” she said, pointing out that legislation like this not only impedes health care but will cost the military talented members.

“If that’s the way we’re going to be treated… if that’s the tone that Congress and the government wants to set, then that’s pretty unfortunate because you’re going to lose combat experience; you’re going to lose leaders with decades of valuable experience that the military needs. It’s a scary world out there, so it’s a pretty sad state of affairs for our national security that you’re going to ask folks to make that decision and not support their families.” 

One parent and veteran spouse of a now trans adult is devastated by the fact that the increasingly hostile environment could dash their child’s dream of serving in the military.

“It’s all they’ve ever wanted — to be like their dad, to carry on a family tradition of service to the country,” she said. “I don’t think I can truly even express how devastating it would be for them to not be able to fulfill those dreams.” 

House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY) said that Democratic congressional leadership didn’t tell legislators how to vote on the bill, adding that there’s a lot of “positive” and “bipartisan” provisions in the NDAA but also some “troubling” ones, CBS News reported.

Senators will now vote on the bill. If their version is identical to the House’s and passes in the upper congressional chamber, it will go to President Joe Biden’s desk, where he may veto or sign it into law. In the past, Biden has promised to veto legislation that harms the LGBTQ+ community.

If Biden signs the law, it would be the first federal statute restricting the LGBTQ+ community since the infamous “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy of the 1990’s which heavily restricted LGBTQ+ people’s membership from serving in the military.

Another military spouse with an adult trans daughter said she worries that the anti-trans provision is a “slippery slope” toward ultimately banning gender-affirming care for adults through TRICARE as well.

“I do get concerned about that moving forward, that this could impact my daughter, this could impact older trans adults. I don’t know where this ends, so I think it’s a really dangerous road to start down.” 

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