Trans journalist Erin Reed recently emphasized the need to engage more moderate liberals in conversation about the need to fight for trans people in sports.

On her Substack, Erin in the Morning, Reed wrote about her interaction with a 62-year-old man who described himself online as a “diehard liberal” yet said he agreed “with banning male-born bodies from female teams” since “it’s clearly a huge advantage and unfair for the women.”

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Instead of scoffing at the man’s transphobia and moving on with her day, Reed decided to dig deeper.

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“I scrolled through his comment history to see if he was a troll,” she wrote. “He wasn’t. In fact, he had engaged earnestly with many of my posts: supporting trans rights, opposing bathroom bans, speaking out against the transgender military ban. He was, in other words, exactly the kind of person reflected in polling—an ally who still felt unsure when it came to trans participation in sports.”

So she decided to engage him in conversation and made what she said she “hoped was a reasonable, moderate case against transgender sports bans… and it worked!”

Reed said she was able to reach him by pointing out that the sensationalized stories he hears on Fox News involve “highly physically demanding” sports like swimming, track, and boxing. But right now, she explained, trans sports bans are affecting anything in the category of sport, like darts, fishing, and chess, where Reed said “no conceivable athletic advantage exists.”

She explained to him, “These laws aren’t about fairness in competition; they’re about exclusion, plain and simple.”

Her arguments, she said, convinced the man that the laws were unfair, and he went on to wonder if it was possible to only ban trans people from sports with significant physical components.

“I could tell I was getting through to him. To be fair, I expected I would—this wasn’t the first conversation like this I’ve had. That’s because once you pull back the curtain, the reality of transgender participation in sports looks nothing like the version fed to the public by conservative media—and, frankly, even some liberal outlets.”

“Most people who take a stance on the issue, aside from the diehards, haven’t given it much real thought. They haven’t looked closely at how these bans are written, how they’re enforced, or who they actually affect.”

Reed said that trans women should be allowed to participate on women’s teams in any sport, physical or not, since “no study has shown that transgender women on hormone therapy for more than two years retain a biological advantage in any sport.” But, she said that argument is the wrong place to start for wary folks like this man.

“The science can come later,” Reed said. “What I’ve found more effective is showing how trans participation is already being handled—and how, in practice, it’s far fairer and more thoughtful than the blanket bans being pushed across the country.”

Their conversation concluded with them agreeing that, at the very least, it would make more sense for each sport to set its own regulations and that sports like swimming should not be treated the same as darts.

“I reached him,” Reed said. “Maybe not all the way, but enough that the next time someone brings up transgender athletes, he might pause. He might say, ‘Did you know they actually banned trans people in chess and darts? I don’t know, that’s a step too far.’ And that moment of doubt matters.”

“This is someone who sees himself as a moderate—and here’s the truth: broad transgender sports bans are not moderate policy. They’re sweeping, reactionary, and often absurd. But polling rarely captures that nuance. Most surveys skim the surface, never probing deeper than a gut reaction. The more people actually learn about how these bans work, the harder they are to defend.”

Reed said she hoped her story would resonate with other moderates, but the piece can also serve as a guide for how trans advocates can engage those around them who have not yet been convinced.

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